Love Letter to my Fellow Moms
Happy Mother's Day! This is the second year that I have enjoyed Mother's Day since Aily joined our family, so I admit I am still a newbie on the Mom Scene. That said, I've had some time to reflect on what I've learned in my time as a mother, and I'm going to sum up my Big Life Lessons below.
- All moms need more encouragement. Even my best mom friends worry that they are setting up their kids for future therapy bills. We are in a culture that spends a lot of time telling us that we are Not Enough - not thin enough, rich enough, beautiful enough, fulfilled enough, present enough, positive enough, etc. It's completely exhausting! Social media feeds the endless loop of comparison and can make us feel inadequate on the daily if we aren't conscious of it. At the same time, I am surrounded by moms that are genuinely doing their best. I am reading the parenting articles, trying to keep away from my phone, trying to keep my child enriched and learning everyday and trying to make sure she feels loved and secure - and so are my friends. I know in my heart that even caring about being a good mother means you are likely doing a great job, but that doesn't mean I don't like to hear it! The lesson? Let's encourage each other. When you see other moms knocking it out of the park, tell them! We all know we need the validation.
- Every mom needs a village and accepting help when you need it is vital. Your particular personality and blend of strengths and weaknesses are designed for YOUR kiddo - but no one person can be everything to everyone. It's impossible to be perfect and while it's tempting to try, your sanity depends on accepting help when you need it. So many of my clients talk about feeling bad about hiring an organizer instead of doing it themselves, but there is absolutely nothing wrong with utilizing someone else's strengths to improve your home life. I know I could watch YouTube videos and figure out how to update the electricity in my home, but I know I would be terrible at it and likely burn my house down, so we call an electrician. No shame.
- Good planning and organization will prevent a lot of issues, but even the best moms have had to walk through Target with a screaming child. I try so hard to keep Aily on a schedule and not to push her too close to nap time or meals, but the dance of productivity vs staying at home to maintain the routine is TOUGH. Despite my best efforts, I have been That Mom with That Kid and it's awful. I know I'm not alone in this, but when you're in the moment dying of humiliation, I hope you'll think of me and Aily and give yourself grace!
To my fellow moms - I see you. You are doing great. Mothering is a difficult, beautiful blessing and I am grateful to be on the journey with you!
